Vacation? I Don't Think So
by Flaming Trails
Summary: An Interlude between proper VDCs. The McFlys and the Time Trippers got more than they bargained for with their vacation.
1. Vacation Time!

Vacation? I Don't Think So

A Back To The Future Story

By Flaming Trails

Disclaimer: I don't own BTTF. If I did, I would have myself named "Queen of all BTTFdom" and all of you would have to make sacrifices to me. Come to think of it, it's a good thing I don't own BTTF.

  


Chapter 1

Thursday, July 10th, 1986

Hill Valley, California

4: 43 P. M.

_Cassandra made her way to the window, her golden hair sparkling in the moonlight. This was the night her dark lover would return. He had promised her so before he had left to seek out his sire. She shivered in her thin nightgown, her body pale. She waited, waited and hoped and_

"And this scene is JUST NOT WORKING!"

Frustrated, George McFly ripped the sheet of paper out of his notebook and threw it away. He had been struggling with his new vampire novel for most of the day, and was making no progress. "Why the hell am I trying to write romance?" he complained to his wife, sitting beside him at his table. "I don't like romance. I like lots of action and strange events."

"Oh, honey, you'll get it," Lorraine encouraged, painting her fingernails. "You wrote plenty of romantic scenes in your first novel. It just takes time. You've always stressed that it takes time."

"I used to be able to do this," George muttered, not really hearing her. "Whip up a story in no time flat. The first story I ever sold, my Jupiter story, I wrote in ten minutes."

"Yeah, but you spent two days editing the thing," Lorraine reminded him.

"Editing's not so bad. At least you got something written down!" He stared at the blank page in front of him, peeved.

"George, how many times have you told me, 'You can't rush the muse?'" Lorraine said, finishing her nails. "You'll find a way to make the scene work. You'll see."

"You'd think that with my youngest son best friends with a pair of courting vampires, I'd be able to write this." Sighing, he closed the notebook. "Where _is_ Marty?"

"Out swimming with Jennifer, before she goes on vacation. I think he's made plans to visit Darkness Falls later with Doc."

"How about Linda? Out with one of her boyfriends?"

"She's with Dave, remember?" Lorraine said, starting on her toenails. "He promised to coach her on her job interview, and today he had the time. You're not the only one having a rough summer, you know."

"You're right, you're right." George leaned back in his chair. "It's been exhausting for everybody. Dave's turning into a workaholic, Linda's trying to get a new job, you've been mobbed with people down at the club--"

"I know, it was a wonder I could get today off from teaching tennis," Lorraine interrupted.

"I can't do a single thing with my new book, and of course poor Marty's got it the toughest of all of us." He idly began rolling his pen around. "I remember, long ago, when summer was _relaxing_. When people took time off from their jobs and didn't have to worry about soulless vampires."

"George, stop worrying about it. It's not like all this happens every day. And besides, there's been no sign of Biff for almost a month. Marty, Jennifer, Doc, and Mystie aren't under _that_ much pressure."

"That's a blessing. But still, as the father of this family, I feel I should _do _something. Take charge of the situation. Just sitting around here reminds me of when I was too afraid to do anything." He leaned his head on his hands and thought.

The radio, which he had left on for background music as he wrote, grabbed his attention. "Come camping at Lloyd and Fox Campgrounds, where you can enjoy every day to the fullest! We have a wonderful little pond, quiet cabins and open-air sites, and a special camp area for the little ones. Parents can enjoy the great outdoors while kids get involved in the camp fun zone. We're open all summer, seven days a week. So come on down to Lloyd and Fox Campgrounds, says owner Barbara Lloyd, where every day is peaceful."

A light bulb snapped on in George's head. "That's it! Lorraine, call the kids and the Browns and tell them to meet us here at 7: 00 tonight. We're going on vacation!"

Thursday, July 10th

7: 11 P. M.

Dave looked surprised. "Vacation?"

"Yes, Dave, vacation. For the whole family. It's a chance for all of us to relax and unwind from the pressures of life."

"But Dad, what about the office? _Time Shore_ needs me! The magazine is in its darkest hour! I've got to fill out forms, talk to my boss, talk to writers. . . . Hey, that reminds me, you gotta submit another story. Your last one was a major hit, Dad. People write letters to the editor and their own stories when they see your stuff."

"David, stop working for three seconds and listen to me. We're going on _vacation_. No work. I happen to know you have three weeks of vacation saved up from when you started that job. Use a week."

Dave was reluctant. "I dunno, Dad. . . . What do you think, Linda?"

"I'd love a vacation!" Linda smiled broadly. "Greg and Craig are on a road trip together, Ryan's with his family in L. A., and Colin's busy working."

"You're going to have to pick one of those guys someday, Linda," Lorraine said.

"Aw, Mom, I'm just having a little fun. Nobody's exclusive yet, and we're not doing anything wrong."

"Even still, I never dated two boys at once."

"Didn't you fall in love with Dad while you were on a date with somebody else?"

"Er -- um -- well--"

"Moving on," George said quickly, seeing his wife in dire straits. "Marty, how about you? You'd like a vacation, right?"

"Sure," Marty said, sounding a little down. "Something to keep my mind off how much I'm gonna miss Jennifer. She's going camping with her dad."

"Well, what a happy coincidence! That's what we're doing too."

Linda's smile faded. "Camping? I thought we were going to the beach!"

"They have a pond at Lloyd and Fox Campgrounds," George said.

"But it isn't the same! You can't get a tan at the pond! And there won't be any cute boys! Can't we go to the beach instead?"

"Linda, I've invited Doc and Mysteria to come along on this trip. I think it would be rude to take them on a vacation they would just sleep through."

"It was very nice of you to invite us, George," Mystie smiled. "I'm certainly up for a vacation. Things are getting a little dull around here."

Doc looked more dubious. "I'm of a like mind to vacationing, but in the woods? Remember, that's where most of the soulless vampires live."

"All the more reason to go to the beach," Linda said.

"And to leave me at the office," Dave added. "Where I can do something productive."

"You should consider the alternatives, George," Doc nodded.

George frowned, annoyed at the resistance to his plans. "But camping is so fun! I remember when my dad would take me camping. It was terrific, being able to see so much of nature. I always felt better after a camping trip."

"I think it would be nice too," Lorraine said. "We rarely get to do things as a family anymore. Dave, the company won't fold, if you take a vacation. I'm sure there's plenty of nice boys working in the camp's fun zone, Linda. And I doubt the soulless vampires are preparing to attack anyone, Doc."

The dissenters caved. "All right, George, Lorraine, that was a good point. A camp out in the woods does sound entertaining."

"Yeah, Dad, I guess I could take a break if I have to," Dave conceded.

"If they've got cute guys at the fun zone," Linda shrugged.

George grinned and clapped his hands. "This is great! I'll go and rent a camper right now, and we'll head out! We leave at daybreak!" Joyous, he rushed to the phone.

Marty eyed Doc. "_Daybreak?_"

Doc looked at George, then Marty. _Marty, something tells me this will be a most memorable vacation._


	2. Talk About A Bad Start

Chapter 2

Saturday, July 12th, 1986

Hill Valley

5: 23 A. M.

Marty was awakened abruptly by someone turning him over. "Time to get up," George sing-songed in his ear, sounding like he could barely contain his excitement. "We're going camping."

Marty blearily blinked open his eyes. "Wha? What time is it?" he mumbled.

"Just about 5: 30 in the morning. Come on, up and at 'em!"

"Jesus, you meant daybreak _literally_?" Marty groaned and let his head fall onto the pillows. "Dad, it's way too early for this!"

"I said daybreak and I mean daybreak," George insisted. He pulled the limp teen out of bed and forced him into a standing position. As usual, Marty had slept in his clothes. "Change clothes and come out to the camper."

It took a moment to process the order, but Marty eventually made his way to the closet. He managed to take out a shirt and throw it on the bed. He quickly followed it there. Irritated, George woke him back up. "Fine, just put on your sneakers and follow me."

This Marty could handle. He pulled on his worn Nikes and stumbled after his father. Lorraine and Linda were already in the camper, not looking any happier than Marty. "Dad, I need my beauty sleep," Linda whined.

"George, the campground isn't going anywhere. Why can't we wait a couple of hours, go to the campsite, and wait for Doc and Mystie to join us?" Lorraine asked.

"If we're going to go camping, we might as well get there bright and early to enjoy the day." George happily hopped into the driver's seat. "What's the fun of getting to your campsite in mid-afternoon?"

Linda groaned. "Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad. . . ."

"Stop complaining. You'll be thanking me for this later."

They swung by Knight Apartments and picked up Dave. He wasn't in the best mood as he threw in his bag and climbed in. "Come on, Dad, I'm exhausted. I was up half the night finishing paper work!"

"It's not like the camper doesn't come with cots," George pointed out. "Trust me, early morning is the best time to get there."

Dave collapsed onto the floor and looked up at the rest of his family. "Why'd you marry him, Ma?"

"I know they're hard to see at the crack of dawn, but your father has his good qualities," Lorraine yawned. "Believe it or not, this is a complete turnaround from when he was a teenager."

"I'll believe that when I see it," Dave retorted. Marty forced himself not to smile.

The next stop was Doc's house, where the vampires were waiting. They handed out breakfast sandwiches from the Burger King as they got in. "We figured you might be hungry," Doc said as the McFlys eagerly chowed down.

"That's the spirit!" George nodded enthusiastically. "See, breakfast at dawn, just what you need!"

"He's really gung-ho about this vacation, huh?" Mystie whispered.

"He can get obsessive at times," Lorraine whispered back.

"I don't think it's obsession as much as caffeine," Doc revealed, sniffing George. "I can smell an excess of coffee in his mint. How many cups did you have, George?"

"Only five, but -- my what?"

"Each person on earth has their own smell, I've discovered," Doc explained. "Yours is mint."

The rest of the McFlys got interested. "What's mine, Doc?" Linda asked.

Doc sniffed her. "Freshly watered grass."

"Oh, wonderful."

"Linda, that's not a bad smell at all," Mystie reassured her. "I once knew an unfortunate who smelled like dog poop."

"Not while I'm eating," Marty said, holding up a hand. "Hey, _I _don't smell like that, do I?"

"Of course not! I believe you've got the most unique smell of the bunch."

"I've never ceased to be amazed by it," Doc agreed. "You smell _exactly_ like the Burger King."

"Get outa town!" Marty laughed, giving Doc a playful shove. "I do not!" 

"I'm serious! Burgers, fries, the whole meal!"

"Even soda?"

"Even soda."

"Jesus." Marty looked at his half-eaten breakfast sandwich doubtfully. "Maybe I should cut down on this stuff."

"I doubt you created the smell with your eating habits. After all, Linda doesn't consume grass." He smiled at Linda. "Unless it's some sort of beauty secret I haven't heard about." Linda threw half a hash brown at him.

Dave glanced out the window. "Wow, look at that sunrise," he said, smiling.

Everyone crowded around to look. "It _is _nice," Lorraine agreed, getting a mushy look on her face. "George and I watched the sunrise once."

"It would look better from higher up, I'd bet," Marty said, remembering his experience with Jennifer last year.

"Beautiful," commented Mystie with a yawn. "Too bad it means bedtime for Emmett and me." She and Doc lay down and cuddled up together, getting comfortable. Marty joined them a moment later, absolutely exhausted. Doc turned his head to see the teen snuggle up against his back, using him for a pillow. "Comfortable?" he inquired.

Marty nodded, closing his eyes. Doc smiled and went to sleep. The rest of the gang seemed to think this was a very good idea and followed suit.

Saturday, July 12th

7: 59 A. M.

After a couple of hours of driving, including getting lost and having to double back, George finally pulled up to the entrance of Lloyd and Fox Campgrounds. A park ranger approached the camper. "Well, hello Mr. McFly!" he greeted the author cheerfully. "I didn't know you enjoyed camping."

"I felt my family and I needed a break. It's been a tough summer for all of us," George said. 

"Troubles with your new book?" George nodded. "There's plenty of campsites open. We've got a wild animal alert in effect, just so you know. Some people have complained about creatures breaking into their campsites."

"Okay," George said, suddenly nervous. Doc _had_ warned him the soulless vampires made their home in the woods. What if _they_ were the cause of the break-ins? He certainly didn't want his family and friends to get hurt. "I'll watch out for myself."

"Rangers will be scouting the area every half hour if you need any help or have anything to report," the ranger nodded. "Have a good time!"

"I intend to." He paid the entrance fee and drove in. He slowly proceeded the road, scanning each free campsite. He finally found the perfect place near the pond. With a grin, he pulled in. "Okay, everybody, we're -- YAAAAAH!"

The McFlys, Doc, and Mystie snapped awake. "What's going on? Where's the fire?" Marty asked, looking around.

"Nothing, it's nothing," George apologized. "Just the way you were all curled up there, arms and legs sticking out in weird places. . . . You looked like some sort of flesh-melded monster."

"Thanks a lot, Dad," Linda griped.

"Be easy on him. I think that with all the driving, he's finally coming off his caffeine high," Doc said.

Indeed, George was starting to feel the effects of waking up at the crack of dawn and downing five cups of coffee. "Maybe you're right," he said, looking a bit dizzy. "I do feel very tired now."

"Aww, why don't you come back here for a nap, Georgie," Lorraine said as everyone untangled themselves. "I'll take over driving."

"No need. We're here." He hopped into the back with the rest of the group. "So all of you can go out and explore." He climbed into a bunk built into the side of the camper. "And, Lorraine, don't call me 'Georgie.'"

"Are you and Mysteria going to stay here with George or come with us?" Lorraine asked Doc.

Doc checked the level of shade. "I'm not all that tired right now, but I don't know. Mystie?"

"I'm tired, but you can go if you want." She went back to sleep. Doc shrugged and followed the rest of the McFlys out.

Dave stared around at the expanse of trees surrounding them. "Whew," he whistled. "This would be a great place for an executive retreat."

"Everything smell like pine needles," Linda complained.

"To your nose, maybe," Doc said, sniffing the air. "I detect _thousands_ of different scents." He closed his eyes and savored them. _Evergreen, maple, pond lilies, white chocolate, a freshly burned out campfire --_

He opened his eyes and frowned. "White chocolate?"

"So what? Somebody's got a candy bar out here," Marty shrugged. 

"I still only smell pine needles."

Doc smiled at Marty. "No, Marty. This is a special white chocolate. If you want to smell something different, Linda, you might want to go down to the pond."

"Special?" Marty repeated incredulously.

Doc nodded mysteriously. "For one thing, that white chocolate is moving right to our camp." A moment later, he was proven right by a rustle in the underbrush. Marty moved back, but Doc moved forward. "Hi Jennifer."

Jennifer appeared, looking a little sweaty. "Doc! Marty!" She ran into her boyfriend's arms. "You didn't tell me you were camping here!"

"Dad only decided we were gonna two days ago!" Marty laughed, very happy to see her. "Woke us all up at dawn to get us here too. Where are you camping?"

"Right next to you." Jennifer gave him a sappy grin. "You're welcome to visit anytime."

"You too." They shared a brief kiss.

The moment was ruined by a pair of loud yells from the camper. Jennifer pulled back from the kiss with a wince. "Ouch! Feels like someone just smacked me in the mouth!"

"Mystie!" Doc rushed into the camper to find his wife holding her jaw and George sucking in air. "Mysteria, are you all right? What happened here?"

"George just nailed me in the mouth," she moaned.

"She hit me with a pillow three times!" George defended himself. "I was trying to defend myself!"

"You were snoring again! Do you know how painful your snoring is to vampire ears?"

"I don't complain when you use the refrigerator to keep your spare blood in!"

Doc could tell this was about to escalate into a war. "Maybe one of you should sleep in a different place," he suggested, trying to remain neutral.

"I'm not moving," George snapped, folding his arms petulantly.

"I will," Mysteria said, getting up. "I felt Jennifer outside, I want to say hello. I'm not going to be able to sleep with Trumpet-Nose here anyway." She accompanied Doc outside as George fell back onto the bunk. "Some way to start the vacation."

"Well, things can only go uphill from here," Doc rationalized, crossing his fingers. "I can understand hitting him with a pillow. Want me to--?"

"No, I don't want the innocents to be subjected to his evil. Besides, I bet now we can slip away," she added, grinning wickedly.

Doc smiled back, eyes glowing. "I've got the sleeping bags. . . ."

Saturday, July 12th

8: 04 P. M.

Doc sat down on the provided picnic table and looked around the campsite. Lorraine, exhausted from getting up at dawn and trying to keep her kids happy, was dozing against a tree. Linda and Dave were having a vicious argument about some imagined slight. George was getting frustrated in his attempts to start a campfire. And Mystie was sulking in the camper, still upset at George for ruining her sleep.

_At least Marty's enjoying himself,_ thought Doc. Marty was visiting Jennifer's camp, staying away from his tense family. _If things continue the way they're going, we're all going to be miserable this entire time. Hopefully, though, things will get better. Like I told Mysteria, things can only go uphill from here._

He glanced around again. _Even so, the tense atmosphere here is affecting me in a negative way. I think I'll take a walk, maybe join Marty._ He hopped off the table and proceeded, unnoticed, into the woods.

Lorraine was startled awake by her children's yells. "You throw yourself at any boy who comes your way! Prove to me you're not a slut!"

"I do not! And I haven't done anything with any of my boyfriends! Hell, at least I _have_ relationships! You just always have to be right!"

"No, _you_ do!" 

"Will you both stop it?" Lorraine demanded, not in a good mood. _Why did George have to drag us here so early?_

Dave and Linda glared at each other. "Sure thing, Mom," Linda spat out. "I don't want to be anywhere _near_ this jerk!" They stomped off in opposite directions, both heading into the underbrush. Lorraine sighed and shook her head.

Mysteria exited the camper a moment later and noticed George at the fire. Her temper had cooled quite admirably, and she was ready for a truce. "Need any help?" she asked politely.

Unfortunately, George's temper had been on the rise ever since the incident. "Why? So I can get some rest and you can smother me again?! Listen you, just because you're a damn vampire doesn't give you the right to complain about my snoring! Or to hit me with a pillow!"

"I'm sorry for that, George. I know it was the completely wrong way to respond to your snoring. I should have got up and moved," Mystie apologized, slightly taken aback by the author's outburst. Normally George got quieter when he was upset, not louder. "It's just that I have sensitive hearing. I am sorry."

"Yeah, right, you're sorry. You just want to show me up again."

"George, she's trying to apologize," Lorraine said.

"What is this, 'Gang Up On George Day?!' I _try_ to give you all a nice vacation in the woods. I _try _to make this a great experience for everyone. And all I receive are insults! It's not like I _planned_ for all of this to happen!" He got up, throwing aside his firewood. "Go back to that goth club where you belong!" he snarled, inches from Mystie's face, then stormed off into the woods like his children before him.

"George?" Lorraine looked after him, then at Mystie. "I'm sorry, Mysteria, he's obviously very tense."

Mysteria snorted. "I try to make peace and he takes it as an excuse to blow up at me." She sighed. "I think I'm gonna take that walk Emmett said to earlier."

"I'll try to catch up to George," Lorraine agreed, getting up. "Tense or not, he had no right to blow up at you. And I really didn't want our vacation to begin with everyone fighting." They walked off in different directions.

Five minutes later, a park ranger walked into the camp. "Hello?" he called, looking around. "Anybody here?" He searched the camp, ending with glancing into the camper. He saw what looked like bodies underneath blankets and jackets. "Eh, they must be all asleep," he dismissed it. 

He noticed a sign on the ground near the tree Lorraine had been leaning against. He grumbled some curses and nailed it back up. "There. Stupid thing keeps falling down." Then he walked off to the next camp.

It was too bad really he hadn't checked the camper twice. Otherwise he might have noticed that the "bodies" were, in fact, pillows and yet-unpacked bags. He would have been more eager to look for them then, considering the sign:

DO NOT WALK ALONE IN THE FOREST.

THERE ARE NO CLEAR TRAILS.


	3. Lost As Heck

Chapter 3

Saturday, July 12th

8: 13 P. M.

Doc felt his head clear as night crept up upon the forest. His vampire senses went on full alert, taking in every bit of information they could find. He took a deep sniff of all the different scents, then scratched his back against a tree. _Ahh, that's much better. This is exactly what I needed, time away from that camp._ His eyes roamed over the natural splendor of the trees and undergrowth. _But I think I had better head back. Things should have cooled off a little by now. I don't want Mystie worrying about me either._

He turned to go back -- then paused. Very slowly, he turned full circle. _Is this the way I entered this location? Or was it this direction? Damn, why didn't I bother to keep track of where I was going? And this thick undergrowth of bushes and the like doesn't help matters._

An idea presented itself to him. Why couldn't he just track his own scent back to the camp? He sniffed his arm to mark his surprising scent -- Dom Pierre wine -- and then smelled the air. He caught his scent weakly on a bush to his left. But it was mixed with something else.

Stream water.

With a jolt Doc recalled the stream he had waded through. The water had obviously diluted his scent trail. Now Doc wasn't sure if he _could_ track it. _Great Scott. Maybe I should try flying my way back to camp._

But one look at the canopy above him ruled out that idea. Nearer home, he might have been able to pull off an aerial escape, but here the trees grew thicker and closer, with more small branches. Doc didn't want to risk injuring his wings and attracting wild animals. _Great Scott! I'm lost._

For a moment, he was frozen, with no idea what to do. It had never occurred to him that a vampire could get lost. He felt the beginnings of panic touch his mind, but firmly pushed them away. _Think through this logically. The first thing to do is to search for any human life that might be able to render their assistance to me._ He listened hard for human thoughts and heartbeats. Nothing. Frustrated, Doc sighed. _All right, let's try contacting Marty. At least you'll find your way to Jennifer's camp. Then you can take off and lead you both to home._

But that didn't work either. For some reason, Marty was blocking his thoughts. Doc began to get scared. _Stay calm, Emmett. Try tracking Marty's scent. Getting to Jennifer's campground might be a good idea. Frankly, I'd prefer going to hers than trying to get back to our own. It's like we got here and everyone decided to revert to the mentality of kids. Ah, well, I guess people do that when they're woken up at daybreak._ He sniffed the air around him, searching desperately for Marty's scent. But it was nowhere to be found. Obviously he hadn't come this way. _Do I go looking for him and risk getting lost further? Or do I stay here and risk never being found?_

After a moment's deliberation, he decided that he had better chances of making it back to camp on his own rather than being found by someone else. _Otherwise we all might end up lost,_ he thought with a chuckle, moving on.

He didn't know how right he was.

Saturday, July 12th

8: 13 P. M.

Linda stomped through the woods, her loud footsteps scaring away anything within a six-foot radius. She hated her older brother with a passion._ How dare he tell me what to do! I'm 19 years old! I can take care of myself! He just can't accept that his "baby sister" has grown up and doesn't need him anymore. And frankly, I'm sick of his "all work and no play" attitude! Hell, when it comes right down to it, _he's_ the immature one! I wish somebody would go up to him and tell him that!_

She stopped, still trembling with rage. _You know what? That's what I'm going to do. I'm going to go right back there and give him a piece of my mind!_ She whipped around, looking like she was on the verge of transforming into the Incredible Hulk.

She very quickly deflated as she realized that all her stomping had been for nought in marking a trail for her. "Uh-oh." 

She tried looking around herself for clues, but found none. Her anger had so hampered her perception of her surroundings, she had no idea where she was. She next tried calling out, hoping someone would hear her. "Hello? Anybody?"

There was no answer. Frightened, Linda came to a horrifying conclusion. _I'm lost._

Saturday, July 12th

8: 13 P. M.

_Just like my teenage days,_ George thought as he clung to the tree branch. Below, he could see a lazy old brown bear sniffing the roots. _Thank God I still remember how to climb these things quickly._

The bear, taking his sweet time, scent-marked the tree, then rubbed up against it. George occupied himself trying to look for familiar landmarks. In his fury, it had taken him all of two minutes to get lost in the forest. It had, however, taken him ten minutes to realize it. By the time he had reached the tree, he was regretting even thinking about taking a vacation. A regret that had been further intensified by the arrival of the bear.

There were no landmarks in sight. George looked back down at the bear. It didn't look like it was going anywhere soon. He thought of calling out for somebody, but he decided against it. What if it aggravated the bear? _You and your brilliant ideas,_ he berated himself, shifting his weight._ I should have taken Linda's advice and gone to the beach._

Saturday, July 12th

8: 57 P. M.

Doc stepped over a tree root slowly and carefully, sniffing the air for dangerous scents. Despite his efforts to find the camp, he was becoming more lost by the minute. _If there's such a thing as "more lost,"_ he thought. _But you can separate "lost" into degrees, I'm certainly in one of the higher degrees._

He paused and took a long sniff. He had seen bears and wild cats in the woods once or twice. The last thing he needed was to get into a fight with one of them. Even if he did heal quickly, it wasn't something you wanted to do. He focused his mind totally on finding dangerous scents, completely ignoring everything else.

Therefore, it was quite a surprise when something bumped into his back. "WAAAAH!" He spun around quickly, his head turning so fast it looked like it was facing the wrong way for a moment.

After that moment, Marty McFly landed on top of him. "Ouch! What the -- Marty!"

"Doc!" The teen grabbed him in a bone-crushing hug. "Boy, am I glad to see you!"

"I'm glad to see you too! Are you all right? You gave me quite a scare."

"Yeah, I'm okay. I had no idea I could jump that high." They both got up and brushed themselves off. "Doc, you have no idea how glad I am to see you. I got lost when I left Jennifer's camp. Can you lead me back to ours?"

Doc's face fell. "I was hoping _you_ could lead _me_ back to Jennifer's."

Marty looked confused. "You're lost too?" Doc nodded. "How can _you_ be lost?! You're a vampire! You've got superior senses! You've got all the advantages!"

"Marty, I'm not a superman," Doc said a little angrily. "My superior senses are actually acting as a _hindrance_ to me now. I'm simply being flooded with information. And since I made the mistake of crossing a stream, I'm unable to put my sense of smell to use and scent-track myself."

"Shit," Marty grumbled. "Can't you fly out? Or would you hurt your wings?"

"The canopy is very thick. I don't want to unnecessarily injure my wings. Could affect any number of aeronautical factors."

"Double shit. I didn't even think about that." Marty suddenly looked extremely guilty. "You were trying to contact me earlier, weren't you? Over the blood-link? Damn, Doc, I didn't realize. I didn't mean to shut you out. It's just that Jennifer and I had found a nice private place near her camp, and we didn't want to be disturbed."

"It's okay, Marty. I knew you'd never shut me out without a reason. Come on, two heads are better than one in these endeavors. Hopefully together we can find our camp."

Saturday, July 12th

8: 57 P. M.

Linda heard a rustling in the bushes nearby. She froze briefly, then scrambled up the nearest tree. _Oh my God, what is it? Is it a bear? Don't be a bear. I'm too young to die! Please don't be a bear._ . . .

The rustling grew louder, and a dark shape started to emerge. Linda bit down a scream, hoping and praying the animal would not attack her.

The shape finally appeared in full. "Anyone? Hello?"

"Dave!" Linda shrieked. "David McFly, you scared me!"

"Waugh!" Dave spun around wildly, then spotted Linda in the tree. "Linda! You scared _me_! What are you doing in a tree?!"

"I thought you were a bear!" Linda said, sliding down the tree. "How'd you find me?"

"I didn't. I was trying to find my way back to camp."

"You got lost too, huh?"

"Yeah." The brother and sister looked at each other. Their anger hadn't cooled completely, and being in each other's presence wasn't helping matters. "So," Dave said, "are you coming with me or not?"

"Why should I?" Linda asked, folding her arms petulantly. "I could find my own way back."

"That's what I thought too. Listen, it's either come with me or be lost for the rest of the night."

"We could still be lost for the rest of the night. Besides, maybe someone else will find me."

"I dunno, these woods are pretty thick. I found you by pure luck, I'm sure of it. Heck, the whole family might be lost looking for us."

"So somebody else could find me too."

"Like a bear."

Linda unfolded her arms quickly. "Lead on. A bear will see you're bigger."

"What, and be intimidated?"

"Nope, he'll think you'll be more filling."

"Har har. Let's go."

Saturday, July 12th

8: 57 P. M.

The bear finally lumbered off. George sighed in relief and climbed down the tree. Unfortunately, as he hopped off, he landed in a huge pile of bear poop. "YUCK! Damn it! Oh, shit. . . ."

With an effort, he pulled his feet free. His brand-new sneakers were covered to the tops with excrement. "Christ, I've only had these sneaker for two weeks. Damn damn. . . . I gotta wash them off somehow." Holding his nose tightly, George searched for a body of water in which to rinse off his shoes.

He found a creek nearby, trickling water steadily. Somebody was already there, though, washing their wing. George frowned. "Mysteria."

Mystie looked up, wrinkling her nose. "George," she replied coolly. "What is that smell?"

"I stepped in bear crap," George said simply, carefully pulling his feet free from his sneakers. It didn't make a difference -- some of the poop had already gotten inside. "I had these sneakers for only two weeks, and now they're ruined." He ducked them in the water and began swirling them around.

Then he did a small double-take. The water was tainted brown -- and red. He followed the small red streak up to Mysteria. For the first time, he really noticed the large tear in her wing. "Mystie, you're hurt."

"Brilliant deduction," Mysteria muttered.

"But how'd you do that to yourself?"

"Trying to fly out of this godforsaken forest. I didn't expect the canopy to be so thick." She noted George's worried look. "These things heal up in no time, you know that. I just wanted to rinse any dirt out of it."

George poured the water out of his sneakers and gave them another rinse. "I'm sorry."

"For what? Me hurting myself?"

"The reason you got hurt was our fight. I'm sorry. Especially for punching you." He sighed wearily. "It's just that the moment we got here, things started going wrong. We all started fighting when we should have been bonding together as a family."

Mystie half-smiled. "I'm sorry too, George. I over-reacted to the snoring. But things can only get better from here, as Emmett keeps reminding me." She finished with her wing. "I think the reason everyone was so cranky was that you woke them all up at dawn. You said yourself you had five cups of coffee, so I assume you didn't like getting up then either."

"You're right." He looked at his sneakers in frustration. "Screw it. They're ruined." He dumped the water back out and put them on.

Suddenly, there was a rustling in the brush. Mystie and George looked at each other, then at the moving wood. _I hope it's not another bear,_ George thought nervously.

Lorraine emerged, looking hot and miserable. "Lorraine!"

"Where the hell have you been?!" Lorraine demanded, not in the mood for formal greetings. "I've been looking all over for you!"

"I was treed by a bear," George told her, kissing her a few times to make up. "Oh, Lorry, I hate that I had to put you through this. Are you okay? I'm so sorry."

Lorraine's temper cooled. "Yes, I'm fine. Just sick of looking for you. I hated seeing you and Mystie fighting. We're all usually such good friends."

"Don't worry, Lorraine," said Mystie with a smile. "George and I just made up."

Lorraine smiled and gave Mysteria a hug. "That's so good to hear! I'm glad to see you. Do you think you could get us back to camp?"

"I can try. Unfortunately being out here in the woods is sort of overwhelming my senses. But I'll do my best. Come on."

Saturday, July 12th

9: 15 P. M.

"100 bottles of beer on the wall, 100 bottles of beer, you take one down, you pass it around, 99 bottles of beer on the wall. . . ."

"And 99 trees that all look the same in this damn forest." Doc kicked some sticks in frustration. "I'm starting to think I've been leading us in circles."

"You think so, Doc? I mean, do they all smell the same and stuff?"

"I -- hey, that's an idea." Doc took a few deep sniffs of the surrounding trees. "Nope, they have a different olfactory pattern. So we must be making progress. Thanks for reminding me that I can put this nose of mine to good use."

There was no reply. Doc immediately got worried. "Marty?" he asked, turning around. Marty was okay, thankfully, slumped against a tree. His eyes were half-closed, and Doc could tell through their blood-link his perceptions were becoming dreamy.

Doc walked over, on the verge of shaking Marty awake, when he got an idea. He gave Marty a gentle shake, just enough to get his attention. "Marty, look into my eyes." The teen drowsily obeyed. "You're relaxed, and feeling very comfortable. Keep your eyes firmly on mine. . . ."

After a few seconds, Marty was in a fairly deep trance. "Now Marty, I want you to remember leaving our campsite with Jennifer. Remember it as vividly as possible. I will be watching and influencing you over our blood-link. You will not resist me. Now remember leaving our camp, as vividly as possible." He closed his eyes and started reading Marty's mind.

Abruptly, Doc saw the campsite again, this time from Marty's perspective. He watched the surroundings carefully in the memory, using his superior senses to check out the territory. Once he was sure he'd be able to find Marty's path, he awakened his friend.

Marty blinked and shook his head. "Jesus, Doc I'm sorry. I guess I zoned out for a minute. What did you say?"

"We haven't been going around in circles. In fact, I think we're getting closer to the camp. Follow me." He strode off with confidence, a confused but excited Marty behind him. About 15 minutes later, Doc located some trees he remembered from Marty's memory. "Bingo! Now all we have to do is follow this back to the camp!"

"You sure, Doc?" Marty asked, a little nervous this was a dead end.

"Positive, don't worry. After all, we're following the route you took to get _out_ of our campsite." He explained to his friend what he had done. Marty was understandably surprised, but also very glad. "Wow, I didn't even realize you'd hypnotized me. But I'm damn glad you did. Come on, let's get back to our camp!"

Saturday, July 12th

9: 15 P. M.

Linda shivered, holding her arms tightly against her body. "I'm getting cold."

Dave pulled off his coat, which he had worn all day as it had been unusually cool. "Here. Put this on."

Linda made a weak protest, then accepted the jacket. This show of brotherly love banished her angry feelings. "Dave -- I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said the stuff I said. I'm sorry."

Dave sighed. "I'm sorry too, Linda. I was acting like a real jerk to everybody." He shrugged. "You're still my little sister, no matter how old you get. I feel like I gotta take care of ya."

"Sometimes I like that, but I'm a lot more than just your sister. But I get where you're coming from."

"Me too." Dave stuck out his hand. "Truce?"

"Truce," Linda agreed, shaking it.

"Aww, how sweet," Lorraine said, making the pair of them jump. They spun to see Lorraine, George, and Mystie behind them, smiling. "I'm glad everyone's getting along again."

"Mom! Dad! Mystie!" Linda gasped. "Boy, we're glad to see you!"

"Dad, what happened to your shoes?" Dave asked, noting George's soggy sneakers.

"Don't ask." He gave his son and daughter a hug. "How are you two?"

"Tired and hungry. You?"

"About the same." George looked at the trees vengefully. "Damn, is there no way out of this fricking forest?!"

"I don't think so," Linda moaned. "Dave and I have been looking _forever._"

"So have we. Maybe we should--"

"Shh!" Mystie took a deep sniff of the air. "I smell smoke!"

"Smoke?! Oh, shit, a forest fire!" George panicked. "Quick everyone, we have to find the creek!"

"Don't lose your head, George," Lorraine cautioned. "But getting to that creek is probably the best idea."

"I don't think it's a forest fire," Mystie said, her brow crinkling in puzzlement.

"Why not?" asked Dave, preparing for a sprint.

"Because I doubt forest fires have the smell of burning marshmallows in them."

"What? Marshmallows?" George said, coming off his adrenaline rush. "Anything else?"

"What smells like chocolate too. And graham crackers."

"S'mores!" Linda exclaimed. "It has to be! That means we're near a camp!"

"Hallelujah!" Dave yelled, grabbing his sister in a bear hug. "Follow that smell, Mystie!"

"Way ahead of you, Dave." They ran to the smell, eventually arriving at a clearing. To their joy, their camper was parked at the edge. Even better, Marty and Doc were sitting beside a roaring fire, roasting marshmallows.

Marty was the first to see them. "Guys! Good to see ya!" He got and gave his family a hug, which they gladly reciprocated. "I guess you were right, Doc."

"I knew that if we got the campfire going, you'd sniff it out," Doc said proudly, kissing Mysteria. "How did you all get lost?"

"Ahh, everyone got pissed at everyone else," Linda sighed, plunking down by the fire. 

"I hope everything's all settled." Doc and Marty began passing out sticks and marshmallows.

"Yeah, being lost as hell has a tendency to do that."

Marty noticed George pulling off his sneakers. "What happened to them, Dad?"

Doc sniffed them and wrinkled his nose. "They smell like dog crap."

"Bear crap," George corrected, kicking them away. "I stepped in a big pile of it."

"Ewwww," Linda said, making a face similar to Doc's. "Sour grapes, Dad."

"Don't remind me. Lucky I brought a spare pair, huh?"

They roasted marshmallows and made S'mores, which were quickly devoured. Even Doc and Mystie risked throwing up to have one apiece. "For chocolate, it's worth it," Doc told Marty, making everyone laugh. By the end of the S'mores, everyone was in a very good mood. "Well, it didn't start happily, but it sure ended that way," Lorraine noted, her head on George's shoulder.

"Yeah, this bit was fun," Mystie agreed, a faint shade of green from her S'more. "Let's just not get ourselves lost next time." Everyone heartily agreed, then grabbed their sleeping bags and headed for bed, hoping for better days ahead.


	4. Double Trouble

Chapter 4

Sunday, July 13th, 1986

Hill Valley

12: 01 P. M.

Doc felt a gentle shake. "Huh?" he muttered thickly. "What's going on?"

"Wake up a sec, Doc. You too, Mystie."

Grumbling a little, the two vampires opened their eyes blearily. Marty was standing over them in his bathing suit and flip-flops. "The whole family's down at the lake. Wanna come?"

"Marty, we were up all last night," Doc complained. "And most of the day too. I want to rest."

"Come on guys, the water's great. Feels just like a warm bath. You'll really like it."

"Haven't you ever heard of the injunction against crossing running water?" Mystie sleepily joked.

"Nice try, but this water is perfectly still. Anyways, you guys can catch some z's on the beach too. That's what Linda is doing. Please, it'll be more fun with you guys around."

Doc and Mystie looked at each other. _I doubt he'll leave us in peace if we don't come,_ Mystie thought, making sure Doc was reading her mind. "All right, George Jr., we'll be down shortly."

"Hey!"

"Well, it's true," Doc pointed out, forcing himself to his feet. 

"Just don't say it out loud, okay? I'll see ya down there." Marty headed back to the path. The vampires stretched, got their bathing suits on, and followed, leaning on each other for support.

George was building a sand castle when they arrived. "Hiya," he greeted them, sculpting a tower. "I didn't think you were coming down to join us."

"Your son is a very persuasive speaker," Mysteria yawned sarcastically. She dumped her towel on the sand and got comfortable. "Ahh, just right. Snuggle in, Emmett, the sand is perfect for a nap."

"So's the water," Doc said, dipping a foot in. "It _is_ just like a bath." He waded in. "I think I'll take a dip."

"Suit yourself." Mystie built herself a sand pillow and went back to sleep. Doc waded in a bit further, then dove in. The water felt absolutely fantastic. He came back to the surface and prepared for a comfortable doze.

Only to suddenly find someone sitting on him. "I'm not a flotation device," he told Marty, swimming out from under him.

"Yes you are." Marty climbed back onto him, obviously in a playful mood. Doc picked him up and threw him into the water. The teen sank like a stone.

When he didn't emerge after a few minutes, Doc started to get worried. "Marty?" He paddled closer to the spot where Marty had splashed down. "Marty, are you down there?"

He heard someone coming up behind him. Quickly, he turned to deal with the threat. "Who's there?"

Marty burst from the water and jumped on him. "Tickle tickle!"

"Oh, no! No Marty!" Doc begged, laughing hysterically as Marty stuck his hands under his armpits. "Stop it!" He twisted out of the teen's grip and swam away. Marty followed, obviously ready for more. "No, Marty, I mean it. I'm tired. I don't want to play." He enforced his point by sending Marty his feelings over the link. 

Marty sulked. "Whenever I feel like acting like a little kid again, nobody else wants to play."

"Blame my nocturnal nature." Doc couldn't help but feel a little bad as he looked at Marty's depressed face. He ruffled the teen's damp hair. "If you must, use me as a flotation device."

"Thanks." Marty lay down on him, head on his chest. Doc was very pleasantly reminded of 1955, and how once Marty had fallen asleep against him. He draped an arm over Marty's shoulders and pulled him close. The effects of the sunshine caught up to him, and he slept.

Sunday, July 13th

1: 19 P. M.

Doc awoke almost an hour later. Marty had swam back to the beach, and was now feeding Jennifer animal crackers. And floating in the water a few feet from him was Mysteria, sleeping soundly.

Doc smiled wickedly. He was feeling more awake now, and, like Marty, he was in mischievous mood. He took a deep breath and ducked under the water. As noiselessly as possible, he swam up to her. She didn't seem to notice a thing. Doc very carefully slid his hands underneath her armpits.

He had planned to tickle her, then throw her into the water, like he had done with Marty. But she abruptly came to -- and completely flipped out! "EEEK! What the hell are you doing?!" she screamed, hitting him in the face.

"OW! I'm sorry, honey, I--" Doc attempted to apologize. Why was Mystie so upset?

"Honey?! Get away from me, you pervert! Sheez, a woman isn't safe anymore! I'm getting a ranger!"

"What?? Honey, I'm sorry. Why are you acting like this?"

"I'm not your honey! Don't come near me!" She threw water in his face and swam out, racing away.

Doc wiped the water out of his eyes, baffled. What had possessed his fiancee to act like that? He had expected she might be startled, yes, but _attack_ him? And something had bothered him about her smell, too. He knew her special combination of roses and lilies very well. Something had been off.

_But it _had_ to be Mystie,_ Doc thought, swimming to shore. _Nobody could look exactly like her. And maybe the pond water was playing tricks with my sense of smell. I should talk to Matt about this once we get home, all my senses seem to be misfiring lately._

Marty and Jennifer were looking stunned when Doc approached them. "Jesus, Doc, what the heck did you do?" Jennifer asked.

"I scared her, that's all," Doc said, baffled. "She's used to me doing that. It's a game we play with each other. She's never acted like this."

Jennifer looked thoughtful. "You know, something about her seemed a little off to me. Like she wasn't really Mystie."

"Good, then it's not just me," Doc replied in relief. "For a moment, I thought my senses were going haywire."

"Trust me, Doc, if they weren't working, we'd probably still be lost," Marty assured him.

George came over, looking like a hurt puppy. "What was wrong with Mystie? She ran right over my castle!" He gestured towards the wreck of sand that had once been a proud castle.

"I scared her, and she attacked me!" Doc shook his head. "She ran off into the woods, I have to find her."

"We'll start the campfire," Marty said, tickling Jennifer with a cracker. Doc gave him a look and walked into the woods. He took advantage of his surroundings to give all five of his senses a check-up. Everything checked out fine. So what was wrong?

Just then, "Mystie" -- or at least her evil twin -- came storming up, followed by a park ranger. "There he is! Had his hands all over me!" She slapped him hard. "Pervert!"

Doc took a hard sniff of her personal scent. It was roses -- and _lilacs_. So it _wasn't_ Mystie after all! _My God, they look exactly alike, right down to the bathing suit! Well, there are those small differences here and there -- but God. No wonder I thought she was Mystie._

The park ranger glared at him. "Listen, Dr. Brown, in the town people may tolerate your weird ways, but here in the campgrounds, we care about the people you have to interact with!"

"I'm _extremely_ sorry," Doc said, blushing. "It's just that this woman bears an _incredible_ resemblance to my fiancee. I didn't know, and I'm very, very sorry. Please forgive me."

"No way! Sorry doesn't cut it, buster. I don't believe that dumb fiancee story. Anyone who messes with Jessica Van Helsing–"

She stopped as Doc fainted dead away. "What the -- what's with him?"

"I don't know. Might just be something he does. He's crazy, you know."

Just then, the _real_ Mysteria appeared. "Emmett!" She ran to Doc's side, frightened. "Emmett! Emmett, I -- holy cow."

Jessica's eyes grew round. "Oh my God," she mumbled. "Who are you?"

Marty and Jennifer came onto the scene. "Hey, Mystie, I felt -- Mystie?" His head swivelled between the "twins." "Er, who's who?"

"I'm Mysteria. Mysteria Jones," Mystie said for Jessica's benefit. She blinked a few times, not believing her eyes. _We've even got the same bathing suit! And almost the exact same smell! Oh, poor Emmett, I wonder what happened._ "What's your name?"

"Jessica Van Helsing." Mysteria immediately moved in front of Doc protectively. "I don't believe this. We could be twins."

"Maybe we're related," Mystie hypothesized. It wasn't too far-fetched -- back when she had still been mortal she had had a sister. Maybe this "Jessica" was a descendant of her. "What are you doing around my fiancee?"

"Fiancee?" Jessica gasped, horrified. "He really _did_ mistake me for you! I just chewed him out for surprising me in the pond. God, I'm so sorry! I feel awful now."

"That's what I get for going to the bathroom," Mystie sighed. "I'll tell him once he comes to."

Marty looked at Jennifer. "Van Helsing. That's an interesting name. I didn't think there was a real one."

Jessica smiled, looking even more like Mystie. "I know. I've heard every comment under the sun about my relation to Dracula. I guess it doesn't help I have a grandfather who really _is _a Dr. Van Helsing." She shook her head. "You know what makes it really ironic? I'm a big fan of Anne Rice's books. I know The Vampire Lestat cover to cover. If she writes any more, I think I'll start my own fan club about him." She giggled, then returned to her former remorseful look. "This is so embarrassing. I think I'll leave before he wakes up. Once again, I'm so sorry." She and the park ranger left, shaking their heads.

"That was _so creepy_," Jennifer said once they were out of earshot.

"I know. I can't believe that our scents would be so alike. Poor Emmett." She scraped her wrist and gave Doc a little blood to revive him.

Doc came to. "I don't feel a stake," he muttered, feeling his chest.

"Turns out 'Van Helsing' is a fan of our kind," Mystie said, patting his head. "Maybe that will teach you to be more careful about scaring me," she added playfully, tapping his nose.

Doc grabbed her hand and sniffed it. "Oh, Mystie, am I glad it's you!" He threw his arms around her. "I was completely bewildered when that Van Helsing woman attacked me. . . . A vampire _fan_, did you say?" Mystie nodded. "So I fainted for nothing."

"Oh, I wouldn't say that," the vampire purred. "You're cute when you're unconscious."

Doc rolled his eyes and got to his feet. "I'm going back to the beach and forget this ever happened."

"I'll join you."


	5. The Case Of The Missing Papers

Chapter 5

Tuesday, July 15th, 1986

Hill Valley

8: 49 A. M.

Lorraine sighed as she spotted Dave at a picnic table, hard at work filling out forms. He'd slipped back into his workaholic ways yesterday, forgoing a hike in favor of writing out reports. Not that the hike had been all that wonderful -- the mosquitos had eaten them alive -- but it was important for Dave to relax. At home, he was so obsessed with moving up the cooperate ladder, it was scary. _Why here, Dave?_ she thought sadly. _You do all this at home, and much more. You should be resting._

She walked up to him, determined to put a stop to this behavior. "Dave, do you want to go for a swim with me? Or a hike?"

"Can't, Mom. These gotta come first." He kept writing at an almost superhuman speed. It reminded Lorraine unpleasantly of a robot.

"David, we came here to have fun. I doubt that -- that -- What _are_ you doing?"

"Huh? Oh, these are supply order forms."

"You mean you're ordering pens and pencils?!"

Dave nodded. "We're always running low. I'm just getting a head start."

Lorraine gave an exaggerated groan. "Dave, this is a _vacation_. Do you remember what a vacation is? A vacation is when you put away the order forms and go out and enjoy yourself. Your company is doing fine without you. They do not need you to order ink for the copy machine. Now come along, we're going on a hike to find your father."

"Mom, I _can't._ I need to get this done!" He turned back to his papers, frustrated at her inability to understand, but quickly turned back around. "But first I have to go to the bathroom." He gave her a look to warn her not to comment on the irony, then headed for the pond's facilities.

Lorraine watched him go. It pained her to think that her oldest son might prefer his job to his family. She glared at the order forms that were taking away her son.

Then she smiled. Quickly looking around to make sure she was alone, she grabbed the forms and took them to the camper. Giggling a little, she stuffed them into her bag, among her "privates." "There," she said, satisfied. "He'll never to think to look in my bag. Now he'll _have _to be with us." Thinking she had restored harmony to her family, she left to look for George.

A few minutes later, Dave returned, only to find his forms missing. He looked all around and under the table, but they were nowhere to be found. He wondered for a moment if they had blown away, but there was no wind to speak of, and his pen was still in place. So what had happened?

Marty walked by, on his way to Jennifer's camp. "Hey, Dave, what's up?"

"My forms are missing," Dave mumbled, scratching his head. "They were right here a minute ago."

Marty snorted. "If I were you, I'd be _glad_ they were missing. Mom's liable to have conniptions if you keep working on our vacation."

"Yeah, she was giving me grief just a few minutes ago. They were _right here_!" Dave looked around again. "They can't have blown away. And what would an animal want with paper?" Suddenly he turned on Marty with a glare. "What have you done with my papers?"

"_Me_?? Nothing! I didn't touch your papers!"

"Sure you didn't. Everybody's been complaining about me working, but only you could have taken them! Where are they?"

"I didn't touch your stinking forms! I was with Doc and Mystie, and now I'm on my way to pick up Jen."

"With Doc and Mystie? They're asleep!"

"Yeah, but Doc appeared to be having a nightmare. I was helping him calm down."

Dave's eyes narrowed. "Interesting. They're sleeping, which means no witnesses. And they're in the perfect position -- close to camp. Tell me the truth -- where are my papers? And how'd you know they were forms?"

"I heard you say so this morning," Marty said through gritted teeth, trying to control his temper. "Dave, I didn't take your shitty papers."

"Yeah, yeah, sure."

"What's going on here?" asked George, arriving on the scene. 

"Marty stole my papers, Dad," Dave immediately claimed. 

"Like hell! He lost 'em and now he's blaming me." Glaring at Dave, he added, "Or maybe someone _else_ took them. Like you said, everybody hates the fact you're doing business crap on vacation."

"Who else would? Linda's down at that lifeguard's cabin every day. Your vampire friends sleep all day. Dad's either trying to think up stuff for his book or getting himself lost -- why don't you get on his case once in a while?"

"David," George said dangerously.

"He's not doing it _constantly_, like you," Marty snapped. "What about Mom? She's got the most motive to commit such a fel -- to steal your stupid papers!"

Both Dave and George blinked, surprised. "What was that?" George asked, confused.

"Doc," Marty muttered, rather embarrassed. "I don't know why, but lately I've started talking like him every so often. It gets worse whenever we use the blood-link, and we've been doing that a lot lately."

"That was weird," Dave admitted. Then he remembered the subject at hand and got mad again. "Why _would_ Mom steal them? She's Mom! Mothers don't do that to kids! She may be pissed that I'm working, but she wouldn't do that. Listen Marty, just fess up, will ya?"

"Dad, help me out here. Why would I want to steal Dave's stuff?"

"To annoy your brother?" George suggested. "I used to do that with my sister."

"That's not helping."

"Marty, I don't know if you stole Dave's papers or not. David, you really shouldn't jump to conclusions."

"Much better."

"Not like anyone else could!" Dave insisted. "He's the only one without an alibi, Dad!"

"Mom's still a suspect!"

"Who's still a suspect?' Lorraine asked, returning from her travels. "Oh, hi Georgie. I was looking for you."

"Lorraine, don't call me Georgie."

"You call me Lorry. What's the difference?"

"Lorry and Georgie, huh?" Linda said, appearing suddenly. 

"What are you doing here?" Marty asked, cocking his head. "I thought you were talking to that cute lifeguard."

"His _girlfriend _showed up," Linda grumbled. "She kicked me out."

"You're just in time, Linda," Dave said. "Funny how we all manage to show up during a crisis, huh?"

"Dave, you can't blame Marty without evidence," George said.

"Blame Marty for what?"

"For taking my papers! They were here a second ago, and now they're gone! He's the only one who could taken them!"

Uh-oh. It wasn't supposed to end up like this. What could she do? "Now, Dave, maybe it wasn't Marty. Marty, would you take his papers?"

"No!" Marty yelled, angry.

"Liar," Dave snapped. "It's obvious you all wanted to take them from me, but only he had the guts to."

"David, you can't automatically blame him!" George insisted.

"Personally, I'm just glad the fecking papers are gone," Linda said. "Way to go, Marty!"

"I didn't take the shitty papers!"

"Fecking papers? That's my job you're talking about. I don't see you with a job!"

"Marty, it's okay if you took the papers," Lorraine soothed, trying for a compromise. "But you can't lie to your brother. On the other hand, if he didn't, you owe him an apology, David."

"Lorraine, if he says he didn't take the papers, that's good enough for me. I trust our children not to lie."

"Hey, if _I_ took the papers, you wouldn't be sticking up for me! Admit it, Dad, he's your favorite!"

"I DIDN'T TAKE HIS FECKING PAPERS!"

What had once been coherent sentences soon degraded into just general noise as everyone started yelling at everyone else. The din could be heard all the way to the next site. Jennifer, puzzled, went to check it out. When she got there, she found five McFlys not speaking to each other. "Hi?" she said cautiously.

Marty looked up. "Hey, Jennifer," he said, forcing pleasantness into his voice. "I was coming over to get you so we could sit by the lake."

"Yeah, I know, I was wondering what was keeping you. Is everything okay over here?"

"Perjurer," Dave grumbled. 

"Don't start, Dave."

Mysteria and Doc poked their heads out of the camper. "What's all the noise about?" Mysteria demanded, eyes glowing.

"Nothing that concerns you two. Go back to sleep."

"That's not what I'm getting from Marty," Doc said, stepping out. "Those are some nasty thoughts about your brother."

"He deserves them."

Mysteria glared at them all. "I haven't gotten a decent day's sleep throughout this entire vacation! What is with you people?! Jennifer may I -- thank you." She hugged Jennifer gratefully. "Think when you've got this mess straightened out, baby. I know you won't be able to sleep until you do."

"Gotcha." They shared a brief kiss, then Mystie and Jennifer left together, sharing thoughts on the state of the vacation. 

Doc turned toward the McFlys, looking pissed. "Let's have it. I want _my_ sleep too."

"You can't possibly need 16 hours of sleep," George argued.

"I doubt I do, but sunlight keeps us both extremely tired in daylight hours. Unfortunately, I'm not liable to get much restful sleep if Marty's upset. So out with it."

_Marty stole my papers,_ Dave thought, not trusting himself to speak. _Now he won't admit that he did._

_I didn't take his fricking papers. I was with you. You were having a nightmare, remember?_

_Marty _could_ have taken them, even if he was with you. _Doc thought he detected overtones of guilt to Lorraine's thoughts.__

_I was trying to promote peace! Why does everything go wrong for me. . . ._

_I'm just glad they're gone. They were going to lead to a fight anyway._

"So something happened to Dave's papers, and the automatic response was to blame Marty?" Doc summarized, looking miffed. "Why?"

"He's the only one without an alibi," Dave snapped. "How the hell could you tell if he was there or not? And besides, you'd never want to get him in trouble."

"Admit to taking the damn papers already," Linda advised Marty in a whisper. "Even if you didn't, everybody will be happy."

Marty looked at Doc helplessly. _You believe me, dontcha Doc? Help me out here._

_I do believe you. But I suspect no one else will unless I do something drastic._

_Drastic's good. Go with drastic._

_Okay._ "What if I hypnotize Marty and make him tell the truth? Then will you be satisfied, Dave?"

Dave nodded, still looking at Marty venomously. Doc turned to Marty and had him look into his eyes. The teen was fascinated very quickly, his face going blank within a few minutes. It was the first time Marty had been hypnotized in front of his family, and they were noticeably disturbed. "Is he all right?" Lorraine whispered.

"He's fine," Doc assured her. "Think of it like he's gone to sleep with his eyes open."

"Christ, that's creepy," Linda shivered as she looked at her brother's blank expression.

"It scared me the first couple of times too. I can close his eyes if you like." Everyone nodded, very creeped out. "Marty, close your eyes."

Marty's eyes shut obediently. "Marty, you must tell the truth to me. You can't lie. Did you take your brother David's papers?"

Marty slowly shook his head. Dave looked chastened. "Did you see or hear who did it?" Another shake of the head. Doc turned to Dave, who was now even beginning to blush a little. "Well, Dave? I can confirm he's telling the truth if you're still skeptical. I felt his presence during my nightmare."

"Okay, okay, I believe you. But _someone_ took them."

"We'll worry about that in a moment." Doc woke Marty up. _Success, Marty. They're satisfied you're not a thief._

_Finally! _Marty glared at Dave. "I'm sorry I blamed you," his brother muttered. "I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions."

"I'm sorry too, dear." Lorraine gave him a hug as he got up. "But, Doc? Do us a favor and never hypnotize anyone in front of us again. That was the scariest thing I've ever seen."

"Agreed," Doc said, fully understanding.

"Doc, could _you_ find my papers?" Dave begged. "I really need to finish them. And when I find out who took them. . . ." He allowed his voice to trail off in what he felt was a menacing way.

"I'll try. Could I have a word with you in private first, though?" Dave nodded, not suspecting anything. They walked into the woods a few steps from camp. A few minutes later, Doc walked out and motioned everyone over. "I hypnotized him into think he didn't take the papers along. I know how much you all hate the fact that he's working on a vacation. So don't anyone mention them unless it's absolutely necessary."

Lorraine hid a relieved "whew." For a moment there, she had run the risk of discovery! Shoving those thoughts away so Doc couldn't read them, she said, "Thank you so much. Now he can enjoy his vacation." _And I don't have to live with the fact that I got one of my own children in trouble with his siblings. Next time, Lorraine, plan these things out more throughly._

"And I can get some sleep." He sent a message to Mystie, nodding when he was satisfied she had read his mind. His look abruptly changed to one of surprise, then to one of amusement. "What is it, Doc?" asked Marty. 

"Mysteria just caught back up with her twin, Jessica. The poor woman's been avoiding me because of what happened the day after yesterday. She tried to convince her I wasn't out for revenge, but she didn't believe her." He shook his head. "I doubt I'm going to be seeing her for the remainder of the trip. Which is just fine with me, actually. I'm quite content with having only _one_ Mystie around."

He turned to go, but paused and motioned Lorraine over. "In the interest of family harmony, I won't say this in front of everyone. But Lorraine, don't immediately look for someone to blame when you do something wrong."

Lorraine blushed. "How'd you find out?"

"You smell a little like ink, and I caught those thoughts you didn't want me to read. Honestly, Lorraine, Marty and Dave are your _sons. _I think they deserve more respect than that."

"Don't tell me how to parent," Lorraine snapped, obviously upset. "You're not a father and never will be, so shut up. Besides, I tried to defend Marty at first. I didn't expect Dave to get that angry. You know I would never just abandon one of my own children."

"Even so, Lorraine, that was pretty selfish."

"Live with it."

Dave poked his head out of the woods. "Hey, Ma, I thought we were going on a hike. To make up for the one I missed yesterday."

"Yes we are," Lorraine said, shooting one final glare at Doc. "A very _long_ hike." She bent a few branches to start marking their trail and shooed Dave back into the trees. George and Linda looked at each other, shrugged, and went their separate ways.

Marty walked up to Doc, having overheard. "_Mom_ framed me?!" He snorted, his face flushing with anger. "I can't even trust my own _mother_. . . . I'm going over to Jennifer's. I'll try to dampen down the link so you can sleep." He stormed off.

Doc went back into the camper and flopped down on a cot. His optimism for this trip was completely gone. _What catastrophe will be visited upon us next?_


	6. The Truth Is Out There, And It Just Land...

__Chapter 6

Wednesday, July 16th, 1986

Hill Valley

5: 03 P. M.

Marty sat by the campfire alone, roasting marshmallows as "comfort food." He was still really pissed at his mother and he hoped sugar would get his mind off her. He didn't know where his family was, and frankly, he didn't care. He just wanted to be alone.

In another part of the woods, Dennis Clark, known to his closest friends as 3-D, was looking for firewood. His campsite was running low, and he really needed to find some. Passing by a bush, he spotted the remains of a black jacket hanging off it. He sighed -- it had to be Match's. His friend had been recently transformed into the soulless by Biff's order. He and Skinhead visited 3-D at night occasionally. He didn't mind too much about how they looked now; after all he'd be joining them in a month or two. What really bothered him was when they brought their friends. He hated being looked at like he was a piece of steak. He left the shreds on the bush and pressed on.

After a little plodding, he came upon the McFly camp. His first thought was just to snitch some firewood and head back.

Then he spotted Marty.

A wicked smile curled his lips. If he could get his hands on Marty and bring him to the soulless vampires. . . .How _proud_ Biff would be of him! And it would be one less thing to worry about when they made their bid for world supremacy. Slowly, carefully, he picked up a log and crept up on the teen. With one quick swing, Marty was out for the count. 3-D stopped him from falling into the fire and started dragging him away. He got as far as the edge of the camp before temptation overcame him. He left Marty against a tree and went back to steal the rest of Marty's marshmallows.

That was his mistake. Before he knew it, he was suspended off the ground by an angry Doc. "Well, well. Look what the cat dragged in."

"Put me down," 3-D rasped, none too impressively.

"Why should I? You seem to forget that whatever happens to Marty concerns me." He glanced over at his unconscious friend, eyes glowing maliciously. "I'd say it's my duty to prevent his kidnaping." His grip tightened a notch. "I'm sure I know a ranger or two who would love to get to know you better."

Desperate, 3-D began to kick. It must have been his lucky day, because one of his blows connected in just the right spot. Doc yelled out in pain, dropped him, and curled up into a ball. The unconscious Marty flinched too, but did not revive. 3-D ran to him, picked him up, and beat it out of there.

After a few minutes of running, he had to stop and catch his breath. For a short and skinny teen, Marty seemed to weigh a ton when you carried him. 3-D sat down on a rock and dumped Marty at his feet. _To have my youth back,_ he thought, panting. _I was a track star back in the 50s._

He smiled as he remembered his younger days. When he only had to wear glasses for fun, not for his eyesight. When he and his buddies hand inspired terror in all the younger kids. When he had been on of the unofficial "rulers" of high school.

Then it had all ended in one night of embarrassment. He glowered at nothing in particular. Why the hell had George McFly shown up that night? He wasn't even Lorraine's date! Calvin Klein had been, that bastard, and they had--

All the color abruptly drained from 3-D's face. He looked down at Marty's face, memories long-dimmed coming back to startling vividness. Now he understood why Biff's hatred for the McFly clan had grown after his trip with VAMPIS. Marty was the spitting image of Calvin Klein.

Or, more accurately, Marty _was_ Calvin Klein.

Questions raced through 3-D's mind at the speed of light. How had Marty ended up in the 50's? Did Doc Brown have a time machine, like Biff had suggested? What had Marty been doing on a date with his own _mother_? And what of his sudden reappearance three days after his left? And his subsequent vanishing, never to be seen again? When had all this happened, anyway?

Then, mercifully, the questions stopped, and his mind went blank. Mostly because he had just been hit in the head with a rock, courtesy of a very pissed Mysteria Jones.__

Wednesday, July 16th

6: 09 P. M.

Marty came awake with a groan. "Ouch. . . ." He spotted a female figure by his side. "Mom? Is that you? Or is it Mystie?"

"Wrong on both," Jennifer said, kissing him. "How ya feeling?"

"My head hurts like hell." _And a more sensitive part of me hurts too. . . . _"What happened to me?"

"Doc told us 3-D was trying to kidnap you, baby," Lorraine said, coming in to put some ice on his head. "Mystie rescued you."

"Thanks, Mystie," he mumbled. "But how come Doc didn't?"

"A very lucky kick on 3-D's part, that's why," Doc moaned, his voice higher than normal. Marty looked over to see a bag of ice resting on Doc's "privates." "I thought you would have guessed that already."

Marty winced. "Ouch. That must suck."

"You don't need some ice down there, do you?" Lorraine asked, trying to sound causal.

Marty was saved from answering by Linda poking her head into the camper. "Ma, Dad went off to beat up 3-D."

"Not again! I know he's angry, but we should really be telling the authorities about this!" She excused herself to go retrieve him.

Jennifer stroked Marty's hair, going lightly over his bruise. "You look so cute when you're hurt."

"I don't think I'll make looking cute a habit then."

Mystie came in, yawning. "How's my sweetie?"

"In agony. You?"

"Awwww, my poor sweetie." She kissed Doc gently. "How about you, Marty? That was a nasty bruise."

"Killer headache. Could you help me out with that? Jennifer's helping, but I think I need to got to sleep for a little while."

"I intend to, but I have to do Emmett first. Just a sec." She looked into Doc's eyes. "Any requests?"

"Can you make me feel like you dumped the ice in my pants? Better yet, _actually_ dump the ice in my pants."

"You want to walk around in wet pants?"

"You want to go a week without--"

"Hey, we're still here," Jennifer noted, wrinkling her nose.

"Sorry. I'm not going to dump ice down your pants, Emmett, no matter what. But if you really want to feel that way, I will oblige." She tilted his head upwards. "Now, Emmett, you're relaxing, relaxing totally. . . ."

After the she-vampire had given both Doc and Marty her treatment, she heard what sounded like an argument outside. "'Scuse me." She went outside to see George and Lorraine looking kinda pissed at each other. _Oh, man, not again with the fighting!_ "What's the problem, guys?"

"3-D brought up a sensitive subject between us," Lorraine said, sounding catty.

"Calvin Klein," George elaborated a little. "He had to bring up the fact Marty bears a striking resemblance to him."

"George," Lorraine said warningly.

"The way he was going on about it was ridiculous, though," George pressed on. "He was saying Marty _was_ Calvin Klein. Stupid, huh? Come on, Lorraine, let me smash him."

"George. . . ."

Mystie was very glad she had naturally pale skin. It hid her stunned fear better. "Yeah," she managed to agree, although with George or Lorraine she had no idea, before fleeing for the camper. "We've got a problem" she whispered.

"What is it?" Doc asked, puzzled. 

Mystie motioned for him to keep his voice down. "It seems that Biff's been blabbing about his experiences with VAMPIS. 3-D just figured out Marty was CK back in 1955."

"Shit!" Marty swore quietly. "This is bad."

"I'll say. It's also got your parents in a tizzy. I caught some thoughts while I was talking to them. Seems George suspects Lorraine of cheating on him because of your 'striking resemblance' to Calvin Klein."

"Shit shit _shit_!"

"We gotta do something," said Jennifer unnecessarily. "Mystie, you can take care of 3-D, right?"

"Yeah, but we have to get George and Lorraine's minds off it too."

"Well, hopefully this will pass and they will just forget about it," Doc said, resisting the urge to rub his crotch. "They've asked _me_ about Calvin once or twice. I said I've lost touch with him, and that was that."

"And they've never questioned it?" asked Mystie. 

"They don't like to talk about him much, as you've seen. Remember how flustered Lorraine got when Linda mentioned how Lorraine and George fell in love?" He shrugged. "We'll monitor the situation and step in if it gets out of hand."

"Fingers crossed," Jennifer muttered, fully aware of the McFly's "vacation luck."

"Yeah, really. I'll go take care of 3-D." Mysteria planted a final kiss on Doc's lips and left.

Lorraine quickly filled the space she had left, looking annoyed. "Do I look like the type who would cheat on George?" she demanded of everyone.

"Of course not. You seem like one of the happiest married couples in Hill Valley."

"Well, I know George thinks that I have sometimes. He's so insecure. I don't know _why_ Marty looks so much like Calvin now," she added, like she had forgotten Marty was in the room. Her son glared and blushed. "But I swear to God I didn't cheat on George."

"I'd offer my services as a lie detector, but I doubt you'd take them," Doc said.

"Sorry, but the way you hypnotize people scares me. Too bad you lost contact with Calvin, he--"

Suddenly, Lorraine frowned. "Hold on a second. You've got one sister, right?" Doc nodded. "When was her baby born?"

"1940. Why?"

"And it was a _girl_, right?"

_Oh, no!_ "Umm. . . ."

"I don't believe it! You _lied_ to us for 30 years! And I can't believe I only figured it out just now! So who _is_ Calvin Klein, Dr. Brown?"

"A friend's kid," Doc said quickly, trying to circumvent Lorraine's wrath. "He was sort of my unofficial nephew."

"Lorraine?" George poked his head in. "What's happened? I heard you yelling. . . ."

"Turns out Calvin Klein never was Doc's nephew. He only has a niece."

"So why'd he say Calvin was his nephew all these years?"

"Guys, they're both hurt. Can't it wait?" Jennifer pleaded, knowing the boys would need time to formulate a plan.

"Yes, but we _will_ discuss this later," Lorraine said firmly. Doc got the feeling that she had been sort of waiting for an opportunity like this for a while. He looked over at Marty nervously. He looked back, just as nervous. This wasn't going to be pretty. 

Wednesday, July 16th

8: 37 P. M.

The family all sat around a picnic table, Doc and Marty trying to keep from wincing. George and Lorraine had perfect ice-people looks on their faces, directly their cold gazes on anyone who tried to speak. Dave was nervously twisting a stick he had found. Linda had grabbed Marty's marshmallows and was eating them rapidly. Mystie looked around for escape routes. All in all, it was the tensest scene in McFly history.

Lorraine spoke first. "So, who is this friend, Dr. Brown? The one you think of as a relative?"

"Jane Klein," Doc blurted, seizing on the first name that came to mind. "She's like another sister to me." 

"Can we meet her?"

"She lives on the East Coast."

"We'll chip in for the plane ticket. I want to meet her."

"Honestly, Lorraine, we don't have to take things this far over--"

"You be quiet," Lorraine snapped. George's eyes narrowed.

"You know, I had a hand in making our children," he growled. Hearing a guy like George McFly growl was an interesting experience. For some reason, it reminded Marty of an old horror movie, Willard. He could just picture his father using that voice to command a legion in rats.

"According to you, you don't think so with your youngest. I'm trying to find out the truth. And if the truth means--"

"Lorraine, I don't care. Marty is and will always be my son. 3-D was just being an asshole. Let's just drop this."

"No. I want the truth."

Doc couldn't stand this tense atmosphere a second longer. He slammed his hands on the table and stood up. "I'm sick of this. Completely sick of it. This 'vacation' has been nothing but one long nightmare. We're all acting like children. I want to go home."

"I second that motion," Dave said, snapping his stick in two. "All in favor?"

Everyone except Lorraine and George raised their hands high. "Motion passes by majority. Let's go home, guys. You can argue in the comfort of the living room."

"Yeah! We can argue in the living room with the TV going," Linda said enthusiastically.

Neither parent gave any indication that they had heard. They remained sitting there, glaring at each other. Neither blinked, or even breathed, from the looks of it. The rest of the family exchanged uneasy looks. Dave stood up, having had enough. "I'm going home and taking the camper."

"Sit down, David." Lorraine's tone was almost friendly, making it hold even more anger than usual. Dave sat down, groping for his sticks. Linda started stuffing in the marshmallows faster, barely bothering to chew. Mystie drummed her fingers on the tabletop, chewing on the knuckles on the other hand. Doc sank down onto the bench too, although his temper was going straight up in the other direction. He knew that, soon, he'd say something he'd regret, unless George and Lorraine shut up right then. And in his heart, he knew that wasn't going to happen.

He glanced over at Marty, who was staring at the wood. _Damn it, it's gonna be all my fault if my family's torn apart. I can't believe this._ Doc reached over and patted his back, then glared up at George and Lorraine, silently daring them to make him lose it.

They took the dare. "Lorraine, I swear I don't give a damn if you cheated on me. These are our kids, and you are my wife."

"Of course you care. If you're making me out to be a 'loose woman,' that means Marty is a--"

Out it came. "If you _must_ know, it was _Marty_ who was in 1955! 3-D was telling the truth! Are you happy now?!"

"Dr. Brown, we -- huh?"

All eyes turned to Doc, who was stunned at himself. He had expected just to yell at Lorraine and George for being so fricking annoying. Instead he had gone and shot his mouth off about the DeLorean! Mystie and Marty were gaping at him, obviously not believing they had just heard him give up their secret. _And you call yourself a genius,_ he thought to himself reproachfully.

Lorraine and George were staring at him like he had completely lost his mind. "Doc, are you feeling all right?" Lorraine asked, her anger momentarily forgotten.

"Not really, but continue on," Doc mumbled.

"What on earth was _that_ about?" George said, not hearing him. He turned his attention to his youngest for a moment. "Is this some sort of prank, Marty?"

Dave laughed, glad to have the tension broken, even briefly. "Marty in the 50s. Hey, bro, what were they like back then? You knew them."

"Dave, that's gross," Linda said, wrinkling her nose. "That would mean Mom -- well, eww."

"What prompted you to say that, Doc?" Lorraine urged, getting curious. "Did you just want us to stop fighting, or was--"

"Look, can we drop it?! I want to go home," Doc snapped, sounding like a five-year-old.

George began to chuckle. "Marty in 1955. I doubt he'd last a day back when we were teens."

"Hey, I bet I could last a week," Marty said, slightly offended. _If Doc's gonna throw caution to the wind, I will too._

"Yeah, right. Go ahead, try talking to me like a teenager. I dare you. Call me George."

Marty glanced from George to Doc. Doc shrugged. _Don't ask me; I shot my mouth off with no good reason. Just use your best judgement._

Marty looked at his father again. "I dunno. It would feel really weird."

"Come on, I dare ya. To keep us from yelling at each other." Lorraine shot him a look.

"Fine, George."

A weird look appeared on George's face. "Say something else."

"Like what? My name is Darth Vader, I am an extraterrestrial--" Marty began jokingly.

"From the planet Vulcan?" George squeaked out, eyes wide with shock.

"Oh, _shit._"

Mystie sighed and looked at her husband to be. "Looks like the secret's out, Emmett. If I may, you do the silliest things when you're mad."

"I fully acknowledge this was all my fault. I have no sense of moderation when it comes to issues like this."

"Okay, _what the hell is going on_?" Lorraine demanded. "It's obvious you've upset your father."

"It's like this, Lorraine. . . ." 

Slowly, reluctantly, the three Time Trippers told the McFlys about the time machine. Lorraine fainted after being convinced Marty was indeed Calvin Klein and had to be revived. "Oh my God, that explains why you couldn't look me in the face for the rest of the day. . . ." She buried her face in her hands. "I'm so sorry!"

"It's okay, Mom," Marty said, feeling awkward. "It all turned out for the best. You should have seen yourselves before I time traveled." He described his own faded memories of the "Geeky McFlys," as he called them. Linda nearly choked on her marshmallows as he described the previous version of her. "Christ," she gasped, "was I really that bad?"

"You're saying you're better now?"

Linda threw a marshmallow at him. "You know what I mean!"

"Yeah, I guess. When you're not throwing shit at me."

George was extremely shaken. "So that explains 'Darth Vader.' It was you all along. What did you use for that 'heat ray?'"

"Doc packed a blow dryer. And he lent me some chloroform too, that's how we knocked you out."

"It worked very well," George told him sarcastically. "I woke up with a cramp in my back from sleeping with my head against the wall and my legs in the air."

"Hey, at least you _got_ sleep. I was completely zoned out at school the next day."

"I wondered why you weren't -- er -- reacting," Lorraine said with a very deep blush. "I'm so very, _very_ sorry."

George frowned. "Marty, at the dance, was Biff--?"

"NO."

"Thanks. I've been wondering that for 30 years. Nice to know it wasn't intentional." Then he got confused again. "But wait a minute, you just said you left 1955 the night of the dance. How come we saw you at Lou's three days later?"

"Biff got a time machine and decided to play with history," Mystie said. Dave, Linda, Lorraine, and George all grew very pale. "Don't worry, we trashed it. Emmett's modifying a few of the pieces we saved so we'll have replacement parts for our DeLorean."

"It was Biff, wasn't it!" George suddenly exploded. "Taking pot shots at me that day! Christ, he nearly killed me!"

"That was the whole point," Mysteria explained. "He's got terrible aim with a gun, lucky for you."

Linda suddenly laughed. "Hey, didn't Biff get that scar on his arm from someone shooting at him?"

Marty nodded. "Yup, the a-hole shot himself by accident."

George chuckled with the rest of the family, then stood up. "As much as I'd like to hear more about this time machine, I want to get out of here before 3-D comes back."

"He won't remember anything," Mystie assured him. "I took care of that."

"Even still, I don't want to risk running into him again. He might call reinforcements in on us. Besides, I want to end this vacation before you offer me up on a sacrificial altar." Everyone chuckled, but a few people seemed ready to consider that idea. "We leave at daybreak!"

"What is it with you and daybreak?" Linda complained.

"All right then, everybody pack! We're leaving now!"

There was a loud cheer, and everyone scattered to get their stuff. George and Lorraine kissed. "I'm sorry, honey," they apologized in unison. George, smiling, added, "But I meant what I said. I would never hold an affair against you. It was the thought of you with the person who helped us get together that--"

George's eyes went wide again. "_THAT'S IT_! That's my scene for my book! Where's paper; I need paper!!" He bolted in search of paper, leaving Lorraine laughing and shaking her head.

Soon everyone was packed and raring to go. Marty was the last to board the camper. "I had to say goodbye to Jennifer. She told me that we should use the DeLorean to prevent ourselves from going on this vacation."

"Trust me, if it didn't carry potentially severe risks, I would do so in a heartbeat."

"Come on, Dad, start this thing up and get us out of here!" Dave urged. "And where's my pen?"

"With all possible speed," Doc added. "It should be in your bag, right Dave?"

"We need a vacation from the vacation," Linda quipped.

"Yeah, I think so. What say tomorrow we all go to Super Splash Water World?" Everyone nodded enthusiastically. George visibly relaxed and started up the camper.

As the pulled out of the campground, Doc fell back against the wall, sighing deeply. "I can feel the bad vibrations dispersing already."

"Hey, this isn't my bag. I -- what the -- Mom, what are you doing with my order forms in -- DOC!!"

Doc looked at Marty miserably. "Maybe we need to get out on the highway to get rid of them."

The End


End file.
